Resources
These books, websites, podcasts, movies and television shows represent a sampling of resources that I have found helpful. You may also find them worthwhile. It is far from an exhaustive collection and I welcome your additional suggestions.
Books
“Lost & Found”
By Kathryn Schulz – I cannot recommend this book highly enough. It is an absolutely beautiful memoir, ostensibly about the loss of her father, but she ends up putting into perspective the many things we lose and the many things we find over our lifetimes, and how to hold them all at once.
At Peace: Choosing a Good Death After a Long Life
by Samuel Harrington, MD – A practical guide to making good decisions about the end of life.
A Year to Live
by Stephen Levine – From the thought problem, “What if I had a year to live?”, Levine explores a rational approach to living by recognizing finitude and noticing each moment.
The Undertaking: Life Studies from the Dismal Trade
by Thomas Lynch – A funeral director’s reflections on his life and work. (Lynch has also published books of essays and poetry.)
How We Die: Reflections of Life’s Final Chapter
by Sherwin B. Nuland – A compassionate look at the process of dying and the dignity of life.
The Year of Magical Thinking
by Joan Didion – A personal account of grief and loss.
When Breath Becomes Air
by Paul Kalanithi – A memoir by a neurosurgeon diagnosed with terminal cancer, reflecting on life, mortality, and meaning.
Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End
by Atul Gawande – An exploration of end-of-life care and the importance of living well until the very end.
Websites & Podcasts
National Resource Center on LGBTQ+ Aging
Institute for Healthcare Improvement
National Institute on Aging:
Movies & Television
Six Feet Under
(2001-2005) – One of my favorite television series ever made, this is the story of the Fisher family funeral home and the two sons who take it over when their father dies suddenly. Amazing characters, darkly hilarious, and one of the best final episodes ever made for a series.
Being Mortal
A PBS Frontline documentary by Atul Gawande, author of the book by the same title, that explores the relationship between doctors and their patients who are facing death.
The Undertaking
A PBS Frontline documentary about a multi-generational funeral home in Michigan. This is the same funeral home owned by Thomas Lynch’s family, author of The Undertaking, above.
Harold and Maude
A 1971 cult classic about a troubled young man who meets an effervescent older woman at a funeral for someone neither of them knew, and he falls in love with her. She is about to turn 80 and she is obsessed with living, and also with dying.
Departures
A 2008 Japanese film about a young cellist who needs a job to support his new wife. He responds to a classified ad that he thinks is for a job at a travel agency, but it is at a funeral home. It transforms him.